It’s a little bit before noon here on Friday and I am finally out of my clothes and letting a little sunshine fall all over me. No, there is work to do. I need to do some watering and we definitely need to get those finishing touches done on the Utopian. But for the moment, why Rush? If it’s a matter of Shabbos, Shabbos is way, way, way away from here. Evening is forever right now. This is 52° north latitude. It’s just Sunshine right now. How did that song go?

Sunshine on my belly makes me happy, big fat in your mouth will make you blind…

Something like that. I’ve got to work on this belly. I still have a bit of a belly. There was a time where I was a bit of a water buffalo. I am not a water buffalo anymore. I am very much an ape. And not a very good one. Skin too soft, too susceptible to mosquitoes and this lunch bag here. I tell you, maybe it’s a good idea to carry your lunch with you in a big bag on your belly. Maybe you don’t get hungry if you’ve got a big breakfast bag along with you. Maybe if you’re preparing for a long journey of great uncertainty, you tend to want to have a little fat on you just in case things go really badly. Or, it’s just slowing me down. What’s the truth?

I could look at this belly and I could say it’s very bad because it does not measure up to the aesthetic of… What? A 14-year-old boy? A 17-year-old boy? A boy who is just made of muscle and reflexes? The human animal absolutely prepared to mate and to fight to the death for it. We tend to suppress this because of our need to have leaders. These are the fat people who are full of corruption who sit there scratching their genitals waiting for someone to come and scratch it for them. They do not need competition from serious young men like that.

So, I’m not a young man. Here is another question? Can I work with this belly? Yes and no. Sometimes I get tired. Sometimes I need to do more than I can but I get tired. I know that if I wasn’t carrying this extra weight, I would be lighter and therefore move more easily. And probably if my body had this ease of movement, my mind would be easier as well. Perhaps this is a good intuition and something I should follow.

But if we ask why this belly, we have very many answers. At some point in my life and for a very long time, I ate very bad food habitually as an addiction. I have no idea how much money I spent on restaurant food looking for something that would never quite satisfy me. Why was I hungry all the time? The answer is that I ate from nervousness and the world never stopped making me nervous. The answer was not to continue following this food trap but to step off and rely on natural foods as much as possible. So far, the food addiction is well under control and even enjoyable at times. Now, lake for tonight for example, I can feed my inner pig, the pig I was for many years but no longer am. I can feed it really good bar food that is very juicy and has a lot of cream and texture and spice and fat. All of these things that are in large amounts not particularly healthy for everyday but for a celebration of eating our wonderful. So perhaps I am a little fat because I practice Shabbos and once a week I eat like a pig. A vegan pig of course. A happy vegan pig on Shabbos.

Possibly though, this is from an addiction to fat. That does amazing things to the human body. True, a little fat is a great deal of energy to help you move. The body however does not need so much fat because it has enough of its own. If this is not the fat on the body that we see spilling over the tops of pants, this is our normal supply of fat that is there as an insulation against damage and cold.

It is also possible that this belly is connected to how much physical activity I have. I have been living with damaged legs for a very long time and it is a new thing for me to have legs that work again. It is a new world for me to move freely like this and it has been years since the frustration of dealing with diabetic legs began. So, not making excuses for failures, perhaps this belly is there because I have been sitting for a very long time waiting for an opportunity to walk.

Perhaps the belly will disappear on its own without any further attention from me. Perhaps my current lifestyle will allow me enough movement so that the balance of calories that I take in against the calories that I burned for my life will be in equilibrium and my body will find it form that is most suitable for the lifestyle.

That is if I am not arrested or killed or blown up in an attack. We have much violence in the region and it is always possible that natural life is not possible because people cannot stop killing each other. It is a terrible disease caused by everything that I no longer do. It is a shame that they do not listen to me or even acknowledge that I am someone who should be listened to. This is a failure of a community that is run by fascist. Fascism is a parasite and should not be allowed in the garden. Signs of fascism should be removed immediately. This is not a plant you want in your garden ever. We have been trying to get rid of this species of plant for all of the years of writing and before. Sometimes I think writing was invented to get rid of parasites. It is a shame that parasites are illiterate. If they were not illiterate, they would not be parasites.

Axiom parasitism equals illiteracy and illiteracy makes parasitism. The axiom works. It is mathematically correct.

My name is Sean. I am writing now for the utopian. I am a scientist. I am also autistic. I am high functioning but like all autistic people, I have a problem living with unkosher people. I don’t like living with people whose behavior seems suicidal and do not seem to mind killing me. This is not any place that any human being should ever live in. This is a parasitic place and must be removed from the garden.

I apologize if this is too direct. I am not good at lying. I don’t know how and I don’t know why we should. If information is correct, we need to pay attention to the correct information and we must ignore the хуёво.