It was just a question. We talk a lot about this train tourism business and how much tolerance we have for young attention seekers who just can’t get enough of meeting brand new people. The thing is you shouldn’t misunderstand who we are.

We serve several functions. Goods are transported along the electric train line, mail and the shipment of goods is possible.

We are also the medics. You can tell who We are by our blue uniforms and pointy hats. We are the medics. When people are in need of serious medical help, we are on the way and a clean room will be available on site and fully equipped. Our usual response is very quick and our routes regional.

As for the tourists, basically they work here for free. They understand that unless they are useful, they will not be allowed to stay. And certainly they should not be poisonous. Usually, we call these male and female prostitutes. So, this service seems to be available as well. And at least you can be sure of no transmission of venereal disease. And if you yourself have our blessed nasty nasties, we will do our darndest to fix the situation one way or another. Rest assured.

So it should be clear that our train service is not just there to serve your rapid transportation needs, it’s also your friend. We are there for you. We do our job.

And remember, the best place to fall in love is at the train station.

Oh, about that picture. Willie Mays. I was just thinking about Willie Mays playing center field at the Polo grounds.

And I know that when I write, I have this terrible habit of saying something really beautiful and then describing how miserable it is to have neighbors that ruin every single bloody day, like a locust of mosquitoes that just keep coming until you don’t care anymore. Just inorganic misery. The human embodiment of the cancer cell.

Well this’s kind of like that. You see, Mays hit 660 home runs. This is an amazing sum. Otherworldly. Ruthian. But yet, if we were to simply measure a baseball career based upon what is the known limit of human possibilities, Willie Mays was arguably that guy. But yes, I know that Ruth’s record was 714 home runs. We all know that and when Mays retired, after offering New York fans one more brief moment of Hope, the club was very small. It was him, Hammering Hank Aaron and the Babe and that was it.

But there were 270 games that Willie Mays did not get to play. He was obligated to serve in the military. Willie Mays had to be a soldier. There was nothing more important than the war. Not even Willie Mays.

There is a statistic of how many home runs he would hit per 270 at bats just before he left for the army and that number from just after he got back, which was much, much higher. If we take those two numbers and just pick the difference between them, we can make a pretty good guess. 56. A good guess would be that Willie Mays lost 56 home runs because they said he had to go in the army.

Okay, let’s do the math. 660 + 56 equals 716.

They stopped Willie Mays from getting Ruth’s record. They needed to have a war and they needed everyone to know that there was nothing more important than that fucking War. Nobody has a life anymore because we want to have a war.

Hey Willie.

Hey. What y’all want?

Tell him what you want to say about that. Tell them like you don’t give a shit. Tell them like there’s no such thing as politics. Tell them like you felt it when they took Ruth’s record from you.

I ain’t got a lot to say. I’m tired. I’m just old and tired. I’m tired of being Willie Mays. But yeah, fuck you.

It was hard being Willie Mays. Willie Mays had it hard. Willie Mays was the best there ever was.

Sorry, I just get so distracted by baseball…