Holmes, Holmes!

What is it Watson?

Someone has caused a stir.

Tell me all the details. They’ll be fascinating, I’m sure.

No, Holmes, this is serious.

All right, Watson, tell me what is so important that you disturb my afternoon.

Why, that’s astounding.

What is?

That you don’t already know.

You’ve eaten too much at lunch and stained your collar. By the mud on the tips of your shoes, you’re seeing that woman again on Eastern Street. By the look of your fingers, whatever your previous women have given you have you using alternative forms of love making. You smell of cheap perfume and that’s elementary. You seem extremely worried but I’m sure you’re using mercury to treat the wounds. I can’t see the truth of any genuine problems here.

Well done, Holmes. Everything you have noticed is true even to my deepest shame. But my worry is not for my own future children but for your future as a free man.

Well, this is interesting news. Do go on.

Yes, it seems there’s been a shift in the government. They have come to the decision that they should regulate certain medicines under a negative umbrella. They are going to make them illegal.

As well they should. Only a moron would give morphine to an imbecile. But they really like morphine and we have a lot of imbeciles.

No! It’s the cocaine.

What?

Yes. They are going to make cocaine illegal.

They can’t do that. It’s immoral and unethical. Who on Earth would deprive someone of their 7% solution?

Indeed they have but it’s worse.

Go on.

It seems the lady next door has a connection to someone in the government and has learned about this. It seems she is not a fan of pipe smoke nor of violin music. I heard that she is planning to go to the authorities and tell them that she has seen you inject yourself with the narcotics several times.

I have injected myself many times. I thought everyone understood that. How else could Sherlock Holmes even be?

Be that as it may, Holmes, it looks like the trap has been sprung.

My god. This is an amazing moment. In all the years that I have been alive I have been able to make my way in the world by being Sherlock Holmes, the greatest detective in the world. I have taken countless of the most vile and sadistic criminals who pray on us to prison and saved countless lives. And yet, they would do this to me?

Perhaps you could wean yourself from it. As the doctor, I would not advise cold turkey.

Yes. I must wean myself from this evil. I have allowed this to corrupt me for far too long.

Holmes! Where are you going?

I need a pistol.

No, Sherlock, no! Don’t think that way. No one has to live at that level all the time. You’re a legendary genius. Don’t waste that genius on this moment of foolishness. We can figure out the problem and perhaps find something new. In fact, I hear there is a plant from South America that does wonders for people who care about crystal clarity just like you.

At that moment there was a pistol shot from the upstairs bedroom. Watson stood and then sat again. He put his face in his hands and shook his head from side to side. He felt an ache in his heart like he had never felt before. Finally he understood that he had to get up and examine his friend’s body for accurate time of death.

Get your hat, Watson. It seems we have a job for a doctor and a detective.

Holmes!

Yes, it’s an astounding set of circumstances how the woman in the next building decided to commit suicide today. I’ll take a look at the body and I’m sure I’ll find enough reasons in such a miserable woman. We are going to need an accurate time of death though.

Without question.

Tally ho, Watson. The game is afoot.