Tuesday, October 18th 2022
Yeah. I think he started it because of cocaine. That’s the way a lot of people see this. When you give someone all the money in the world, they get a little weird. When you elect someone four times without anyone genuinely believing in the vote, the whole country gets a little weird. When you believe people can be soldiers just by dressing them up in military clothes and handing them a gun, everything gets a little weird.
Zelinski has some remarks about dealing with a terrorist Nation and the fact that yesterday was International Food Day
World Food Day – It’s your day!
Collective action across 150 countries worldwide is what makes World Food Day one of the most celebrated days of the UN calendar. Hundreds of events and outreach activities bring together governments, businesses, CSOs, the media, the public, even youth, in over 50 languages. They promote worldwide awareness and action for those who suffer from hunger and for the need to ensure healthy diets for all, leaving no one behind.
#WorldFoodDay 2022 is being marked in a year with multiple global challenges including the ongoing pandemic, conflict, climate change, rising prices and international tensions. All of this is affecting global food security.
It’s time to work together and create a better, more sustainable future for all. Make #WorldFoodDay YOUR day. Join the call by organizing an event or activity or show how you are taking action. – from the food and agriculture organization of the United Nations
Meanwhile, Ukraine traditionally marks a holiday on October 14th for what they call the day of the defender. We have this in Belarus in late February. It is basically men’s Day here but specifically it’s about people who have been soldiers. In many capitals of the world, this day was celebrated with Anti-war rallies. Odd that such things are a jailable offense in Russia.
Putin says Russia’s unpopular mobilization of reservists to end in 2 weeks
Russian President Vladimir Putin says he thinks a mobilization of army reservists he ordered last month to bolster his country’s troops in Ukraine will be completed in two weeks.
Putin told reporters after attending a summit in Kazakhstan on Friday that 222,000 of the 300,000 reservists the Russian Defense Ministry said would get called up have been mobilized. A total of 33,000 of them are already in military units and 16,000 are involved in the military operation in Ukraine.
But then again, why do you need men when all you need to do is shoot rockets? There has been another bombing of Kiev. A significant amount of the rockets got shot down but unfortunately, not all of them.
Meanwhile, a Russian jet has crashed into an apartment building in Yeysk, Russia. It is unclear and likely to remain unclear why the plane went down. But what is also unclear, and I’m saying this as someone who grew up listening to stories of pilots practicing great efforts of heroism to save populated areas from Air catastrophe, is why this pilot simply ejected and let the plane hit the apartment building.
Here are some of the latest updates on the war and quite a bit about Belarus’ participation. This is not mentioned specifically in any of the news agencies but the likelihood of the drone attacks on Kiev originating on the territory of Belarus is quite great. If so, on behalf of all of the same people residing here, I deeply apologize for the misguided nature of our leadership.
And finally, Denis Davydov is in Kiev and shooting his own video about the results of the latest drone attacks.
***
It’s coming up on 7:00 right now and I haven’t quite decided to get up yet. I passed the night without lighting a fire. This was more economy than laziness. I wasn’t really that cold during the evening. All that was needed was a second blanket and it was enough to pass the night.
There was some saber rattling from my neighbors. My conversation with Lena was outside and my voice is loud enough to carry. My discussion of my neighbors and my opinion of them obviously created some discord. They do not see their own actions. They only see what they want to see and it is impossible for them to take responsibility for causing the rift between us. In this way, they are a microcosm of Russia. They do the same things that the Russian leadership does. They are above the law and above morality. They will never give up their positions or their perception of their own positions.
What is most probably the truth is that they didn’t listen to the entire speech. They just started talking about the fact that I was talking about them. They didn’t hear anything but what they wanted to hear.
Yesterday I talked about dreaming about a beautiful day. I was thinking about what the day would be like when my neighbor decides to simply move his fence and start parking his car on the other side of his property. It wouldn’t take anything really. I don’t even think it would cost any money except for the cost of perhaps a few seeds to plant flowers and possibly a few rubles for the fertilizer in the area that used to be his driveway. It would in fact improve the quality of his life and the beauty of his space. Not that the family understands quality of life or beauty. You can’t teach quality of life or beauty to chickens. They just bang their head against the ground, destroy everything under their feet and shit.
The reality is that nothing has changed. Nothing ever will change. It cannot change because they have no other way of dealing with me except through objectification. They are not people. They are not people in the sense that they are decent human beings. They do not have genuine feelings outside of themselves. They are not participants in any community. They are only fascists. They only cause pain and destroy things. They only exist for themselves. They’re only social interaction is to talk shit.
This is what we see from the Russians in Moscow. Perpetual pomp and ceremony. They are self-congratulatory. They make declarations and plans based upon their own point of view. There is no global interaction. They are not participatory in world problems. They just want to get that money.
There was an interesting nuance that I recognized when I first started living here. I speak a lot about flat pragmatism and simple speaking. People just say the simplest truth that they understand from what is in front of their eyes. Now of course, this is tempered with “newspeak” dictated from Moscow. You are no longer allowed to say what you see and you must understand the party line and the politics first. Perhaps this is more in line with the entire world. Perhaps there was a time when it was understood that simply telling the truth was easier than creating lies. This is part of my own thinking by the way, despite the forced immigration to the Settlement of Pale and my family’s forced exit from the schtetles. Perhaps it’s a chicken and egg argument as to who gave this to whom. Maybe it’s just a part of the old world.
Anyway, the nuance came because right in the middle of all of this clear speaking pragmatism was this phrase that certain people would say. “Нам очень нужны деньги”. We really need money. It was always said with Hysteria. It was a simple rationale said in the same way and in the same line of thinking as every other pragmatic thing that would be said. All people were the same, everybody needs what they need, everybody understood when someone was a drunk and everyone understood our relation to each other. But right in the midst of all of this simple talk was this phrase. It was a justification for everything that needed to be done. It was a justification for no longer being a good person and understanding that we were all the same and had the same needs.
To discuss my neighbors, one can only see that there are two classes of people. Those who need large amounts of money and those who need small amounts of money. There is no other philosophy other than “we need money”. There is nothing else going on in anyone’s head at any moment during the day. Everyone must be hysterical, no one is allowed to rest, the world is going to crash, there is nothing anyone can do about it but we need money. We need money every day. There’s nothing else to think about except that we need money.
In my case, when presented with these two groups of people, I would rather choose the inconsistencies of the people who acquire a little money. It’s too expensive making friends with the incredibly greedy group. They are not worth my time socially any more than the alcoholics are. I didn’t say that well. They are all alcoholics and drug addicts. They are addicted to money and everything money can buy. And everything that their money does buy turns out to be drugs, quick fixes, emotional decisions, things purchased to make them look higher during ceremonies and whatever leads them to believe in a better image.
I get it. I’ve done it. I did it for a long time. I just stopped doing it and found myself much happier in life. I’ve talked about this for 3 years. I’m not saying that I live in some warm bath of panacean utopia. I’m not saying I float on the top of liquid goo while my endorphins pump out painkillers 24/7. I’m not hooked up to an orgasm machine. I’m just saying that it’s a lot easier to be satisfied with your life on a micro level than constantly reaching over your head for stars that you cannot reach. It’s better to be satisfied in your own eyes and your own sense of morality than to wait for approval from people who have no right to their own opinion. You can’t get a vote from people who are not allowed to vote.
Lots of poetry here. I’m sure all of it’s wasted.
The weather report says that we are going to start hitting serious cold by the end of the week. I’m not too worried about it. I am worried about quite a few things but I’m not really worried about the weather dropping. I’m also not really worried about my neighbors. They don’t ever actually get to eat me, they always end up eating themselves so of course their meal of activity is going to get boring pretty quickly. If they actually have lives worth living, they wouldn’t need drugs like me.
As for plans for today, I think I’m going to do some more cleaning up and I think I am going to take out the bike and try and push it around a little bit. It’s been dry for a few days so the chances of the local roads being like beaches are great. They never stop driving cars down these dirt roads. Even though there are not really so many cars, the road is in a constant state of destruction. It’s all sand.
People say that it has always been this way but I know for a fact that this is not true. We are in the midst of a decade and a half of drought due to the effects of global warming, the groundwater has receded dramatically and the entire ecosystem has been thrown into distress. The forest is drying out, the likelihood of fire has increased but yet they just keep driving their cars off to find money. Nothing ever changes and they are incapable of alternative thought.
Nevertheless, my legs have been feeling much better lately and I think I might like to try a bit of a bike ride just to see how it goes. If nothing else, I could truly use the cardio workout. I don’t feel horrible and I seem to be strong enough walking around. Possibly this would be more harm causing than it would be good for me. But I think I want to do this while I can.
As for going to town, I think I’ve talked myself out of it. It was a romantic idea to go to Temple and I’m sure my not appearing will not move anybody one way or another. It’s just when I think of the possibilities of what this effort will give to me, even though I am a great fan of participation, I think I can be more productive and get more out of the day if I just take the trouble to do the Torah reading myself.
It’s a special one and I feel a great sense of arrival on this day. It is perhaps appropriate to feel pressure from the local chickens and the local church. All of these wonderful mental diseases masquerading as philosophies surrounding me. I am like Ukraine who is like Israel. Just one place trying to do the best they can and yet surrounded by enemies who are philosophically inclined to hate. They never stop having the mafia here and they never stop teaching people to hate. Such as the death of the planet Earth. People end up killing themselves trying to kill somebody who doesn’t want anything but to get by.
I mentioned Ukraine simply because Zelinsky is Jewish. He pays attention to the Christian holidays. He identifies as a statesman and though he doesn’t deny it, he has the same Jewish identification as a lot of people. It’s the same self-identification that I had my entire life. Perhaps I still have. We agree that we are Jewish but we don’t think it’s very important and we put out a public image of assimilation.
I’m not saying that we should all start dressing like penguins. I’m not saying that we should all adopt Hasidic style. I’m just saying that I’m sick of style generally. I’m sick of putting myself up to public vote and I’m sick of other people believing they have the right to vote me out of existence. I’m not asking for public acceptance and I’m not asking for a group to be around me. This is what I’m sick and tired of. I’m tired of fascists.
No, I’m not tired of being me. I’m actually pretty pleased with myself. I’m pretty resourceful and honestly, I have found quite a few satisfactions from the simplest of things. I am actually quite proud of these three or four million words I’ve produced over the last 3 years and my entire catalog of writing and would I have produced as an English teacher. I’m also proud of my bicycling and even my decision to come out here. I’m not tired of being me. I’m tired of the people around me. I’m tired of you.
I just have one more thing to add for today. It’s not really anything to do with Simchat Torah or anything else. It’s just a clip that I found that I thought was pretty excellent.
Six Jews that changed the world.
***
Just a brief clarification. Forgive me for not being an expert here. I really did not know this before. There are two Torah readings this week. There is the holiday reading of the very last portion of the five books of Moses leading directly back to the beginning and this is what today’s holiday is all about.
This holiday however falls on a Tuesday and we do have a Torah reading for this week called Bereshit, this is the word for “in the beginning”, and we start exactly there with Genesis 1. I will cover that on Thursday.
I just want to add one small thought to this discipline of reading Torah every week. I know that I am very facetious and secular and pragmatic and direct in my commentary. I also believe that it is my right to be so and to do so. I further believe that it is perhaps the essence of what it genuinely means to be Jewish that you have these free thoughts, this regardless of anything the rabbis might have to say on the subject or any other propaganda that might come from the temple.
What I am saying is that despite all of this, I am pleased to have this discipline as a part of my life. Even if my thoughts go completely away from anything the great sages tell us we should understand, simply the act of reading and considering seems to be the entire point. Simply to show up and read the words is all that’s necessary to inspire independent thought.
I mentioned before that I’m not sick of being myself. I am frankly a bit proud of myself for a lot of my decisions. Certainly, I’ve done some stupid things that I’m not particularly proud of. But amongst the things that I am most proud of, I am very proud to have spent a pair of decades being a teacher and I am even more proud to have been an independent teacher who told the truth about language and independent thought ahead of following State systems. I am proud to have taught freedom and Independence rather than slavery.
I am also completely proud of my choice to become a vegan. This choice of dietary habit is the single smartest decision I’ve ever made. Politically, it seems to be as miserable as being born a jew. But fuck them. It is the correct decision for the human animal to make. It is perhaps the only decision necessary to truly become a good human being. Shalom aleichem. Be vegan.
***
It’s 9:30 and I am just finished with a wonderful breakfast. I used my Dutch oven again. I made what can only be called veggie stew. There were some potatoes and all of the usual vegetable subjects. At the end it was topped off with red lentils and cornmeal as a thickener. I added just a touch of vinegar and no other spices were needed. It was wonderful and extremely flavorful and quite satisfying. I am warm all over and enjoying some tea.
I have the choice to go back anytime I want but as of the moment, I’m enjoying my switch from my giant Skillet to this Dutch oven. It Cooks much more efficiently and the food seems to be even more flavorful. The Russians have a name for this that I can never remember. They call it either an утятница or a гусятница, both names seem to relate to something like duck pot. Whatever you call it, it’s a staple in my kitchen and I love using it.
At the moment, I am being visited by a black and white cat who is diligently searching my house for something to eat. One of the great truths I have learned as a Workman is the day that you failed to bring a tool to work is the day that you will have to use it. This is also true for people that go to baseball games but forget to bring their gloves. After sitting in my cupboard for a year unopened and unused, last week I decided to give my one package of kitekat cat food to Lena as a gift. This guy is starving but I’m afraid all I could possibly give him is a little oatmeal and I’m quite sure he will not be appreciative.
He is wearing a green flea collar and is absolutely in love with having his ears scratched. The flea collar tells me he is under general ownership already nevertheless, I would be happy to be visited by a cat especially a hungry cat who might do something about the mouse population which will probably rise with the winter. Last year, I briefly had an orange cat named Rizhy who only lasted until I went into the hospital. When I got out, I never asked to bring him home again. I’m probably allergic to cat fur as nice as this moment genuinely is. However, if I had this cat food, this cat would remember me on his route and I could often have him as a guest to look around my house and Chase the mice away. In my personal view, rental cats are far more useful than live ins. Please do not extrapolate this view out to my view of women. That would be inappropriate.
All I can say is, I have nothing to pay him with, he is hanging around just for the ear scratches and for the chance to walk around my house. Nevertheless, just a few minutes of politeness with this cat and my nose is already starting to fill up with snot. Something tells me the mouse infestation is going to be treated in a different way.
The real business at hand is doing some more cleanup/winter prep. Yesterday was a good day in this kitchen. The amount of cooking space I have left myself made me happy. Having a place to hang my giant Skillet allowed me to free up a ton of space on my stove. It also reminded me to clean that stove. And now I am truly enjoying sitting in this room. A few more changes will be coming in the near future but I like how clean it is and I like how much space has opened up.
So aside from the few things I need to do outside in the garden, I have two rooms that I would like to work on. The warm room definitely needs a going over. But more than a cleanup, I am thinking hard about what I want to do about winter modifications. The platform I have in there right now is making me very happy. I am sleeping better and more comfortably, I’m enjoying my evenings in the room and I am extremely comfortable in there. It’s just a matter of adding a little insulation when the weather really gets cold and I’ll be good.
I have been thinking about bringing my computer, my office computer, into the warm room and either bringing the entire table in there or constructing a new table that is somehow more ergonomic to my body. The questions at hand have to do with heating or blocking the heat that comes from one of the two fireplaces in there. I generally only use one but I have the possibility of adding a second one. If the table came in, that heat coming through the second fireplace would definitely be blocked. If I build a second table, I can make it whatever height I want it to be and it will have no effect if I happen to light up the second fireplace. I’m leaning towards building something and the size of that is specifically what I’m grinding on right now.
I don’t think I have anything more to add. I think I just feel good after eating this breakfast. I feel good sitting in this kitchen. I feel good because my legs feel good. About the only thing I don’t feel good about is my cat allergy which is absolutely making an appearance right now. This little girl is cute but she has got to go. Sorry, I believe our time has come to an end.
***
Another good moment. I went outside for a little while to think about what I wanted to do. There doesn’t seem to be a lot of really pressing things to do in the field. By the end of the week, I’m sure a lot of that will work itself out. But on the way back, I took a look at my well again. I don’t know what it is or why some days you seem more perceptive than others. But today I saw something.
I stuck my shoulder under the hand crank and lifted up and then just kicked the support post a few times. Both the support post, which is wood and the land under it have collapsed a bit which has caused most of the problems. The well itself is just a hole in the ground surrounded by concrete rings. The problem is with the little roof and roller system that allows us to more easily lift a bucket up. I can pull a bucket by hand without any problem but it is slightly easier to use the crank and the roof will keep a lot of snow off of it. If the snow piles up, it’s harder to get to it and, well, the well has a roof over it.
Once I started kicking that post over, I noticed the remaining oak Post that Ghenna brought along. I don’t know why he thought we needed so much oak for one bench. I made the supports out of just one of them but nevertheless, the other one was sitting here and I realized that it would make a fine third leg to support the back.
I found a piece of concrete that was an excellent size for the task, found a good place for it and worried the oak Post into place supporting the back of the roof. Suddenly the whole thing stood up straight and probably about 70% stronger than it was before. The roller runs straight now pretty much and a couple of slight adjustments and some dirt pounded hard into place to hold things tight and I think we will get through winter with this.
Like I said, it’s funny how sometimes you just look and you see the answer to a question that has you perplexed and other times you just continue on perplexed. I was thinking of using steel posts and welding eyelets on it to hold the roller. That would be a permanent fix for sure. I also have one or two very large posts remaining from a long time ago that are just sitting around doing nothing but getting old. All of these things have merit as fixes but as of the moment, I think I’m good. This thing looks pretty straight, if you push on it, it doesn’t want to fall down and the roller works well enough that it’s not falling off the ends anymore. I’m going to call this a fix. Good for me. One more check for the checkbox list. Water for winter
***
This week’s special Torah reading is Vezot Hab’rachah (וְזֹ֣את הַבְּרָכָ֗ה). The words are the first words of Deuteronomy chapter 33, “And this is the blessing with which Moses, the man of God, blessed the children of Israel [just] before his death.”
In the first part, he gives a blessing to Reuben and Judah. Reuben was the son of Jacob and one of the leaders of the inevitable 12 tribes. Just as a side note, my middle name in Hebrew is this name. Thanks Mo.
In the second portion, he blesses Levi and Benjamin. In the third he pointed to Joseph, Ephraim and Manasseh. Just as a side note, Ephraim and Manasseh are names mentioned in the prayers for the children every Friday night before the beginning of my day off. I usually tweak this a little bit and throw the name of my own son in there just for good luck. I also include my daughters in the prayers for the girls. Why not? It can’t hurt.
In the fourth he points to Zebulun, gad and then carries on in the fifth blessing Dan, Naftali, Asher and Jeshurun.
With the leaders of the 12 tribes covered, this brings us to the 6th aaliyah, the final portion of the Torah. There are three sentences to the end of Deuteronomy 33 but the last two have interesting language which might as well be repeated here:
28And Israel dwelled safely and alone as Jacob [blessed them], in a land of grain and wine; also, their heavens will drip dew.
29Fortunate are you, O Israel! Who is like you, O people whose salvation is through the Lord, the Shield Who helps you, your majestic Sword! Your enemies will lie to you, but you will tread upon their heights.”
And then Moses leaves the plains of Moab and climbs to the top of Mount Nebo. At the summit, he turns and faces Jericho and the Lord shows him all of the promised Land. He gets reminded that it is theirs and not his and he shall not cross over and then he died. And God buried Moses in the valley and nobody knows where this place is. There are a few words saying that even though he was 120 years old, his eyes had not dimmed nor had he lost his freshness. And with this, Joshua took over and the final sentence says this:
And there was no other prophet who arose in Israel like Moses, whom the Lord knew face to face, as manifested by all the signs and wonders, which the Lord had sent him to perform in the land of Egypt, to Pharaoh and all his servants, and to all his land, and all the strong hand, and all the great awe, which Moses performed before the eyes of all Israel.
And that’s that. The story is done, the leadership has been passed on to hopefully good hands. The story has been told and the time has come to live in the land of milk and honey.
However, this is not really the end. It’s just the end of the book or the end of the fifth book. There are seven aaliyahs in a Torah reading and the 7th begins like this:
Genesis Chapter 1
In the beginning God creation of the heavens and the earth. Now the earth was astonishingly empty, and darkness was on the face of the deep, and the spirit of God was hovering over the face of the water. And God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light…
And of course he continues on and makes everything and everyone and all the universe in 6 days of work. And on the seventh day, because he is wise and all-knowing, he took a day off because he darn well needed it. Words to the wise. Everybody needs to take a day off. You can’t just keep working and consider yourself a person. You’re not a person until you agree that you take a day off every single week. This is the rules for people, slaves are different story. I’m not pointing any fingers or naming names or religions here. I’m just saying that when you take your day off and you really, really, really mean it that you’re not going to work and you’re not going to be made to work and you’re not going to listen to a lot of trash about what you should do and what you shouldn’t do, when you take that day off, you know what it is to be a free human being.
What do I think of all of this? I’m not sure it’s such a great book. I’m not sure that we have effectively or reasonably built on it. I’m not completely sure we have interpreted the book correctly and I think we have added in quite a bit of compromise allowing for human power and greed and corruption.
I think some of the main points are good and real and true. I can relate to Moses in this. All of the words, all of their revelations, all of the magic and all of his presence and yet even when he boils everything down to a couple of short rules, you can’t really get people to agree. People are going to screw up. It doesn’t matter how much you punish them or torture them or beat them into place, people are going to go left on you and it is endless sadness until you learn to agree that there’s nothing you can do to stop this. You can try your best but inevitably, if you don’t Grant people their freedom, you yourself will never have it.
I think I’ve said this before but even the 10 commandments are a little long-winded. It actually boils down to just a few simple rules that I absolutely agree are true. The shorthand of it is that a good human being doesn’t kill, tells the truth, is good to their community but allows people to live and Let live without jealousy and without encroaching on other people’s property or into their lives uninvited. And what is first and most important is to remember that God is nature and nature is God and there is nothing more important than the nature that gives us life and feeds us.
What do you think? Amen Worthy? I say let’s give it a good amen.
***
Well, today did not turn out to be a highly ambitious day. I could look for reasons for my failure but that’s not my style. I did fix that well and I’m pretty pleased with how that turned out. I also did what I could to start putting things in order in the rest of the rooms. But truly, I really didn’t do much of anything and ended up just sitting around.
The catalyst for this was probably a visit from one of my neighbors. Valya, who stopped to say hello on her way probably to church. She had a rake with her so I guess she’s helping to keep the place clean. I know her because her granddaughter was one of my students for a very long time and her family has a lot of love towards me from the experience. It is simply a coincidence that I ended up on the same street but it’s a pleasant coincidence All things considered.
She came by when I was working on the well and we had the usual polite 5 minute conversation. But then I apologize for not coming by. It’s funny what it’s like when you are mostly around people you don’t like for a very long time and then suddenly your manners come back to you when you are around someone you consider good people. Unfortunately, she decided to be kind to me and brought me probably five more kilos of apples. These were the same apples that Lena gave me the other day. They came from the same place. I now have 20 more kilos of antonova apples. I don’t know if this is the same name in English or not and I don’t really care. I begged both women not to give me more food but neither would take no for an answer. Like I said, there’s a difference between good people and bad.
I guess I can start looking for some recipes about saving apples or making applesauce or something like that. I generally don’t ever use sweets. I like apples well enough but there are only so many apples that you can eat. I still have those apples from the trees my neighbor wanted cut down, then I have all of my own apples that were cut and dried. Now I have 20 more kilos to have to find something to do with. My midday meal was apples and sunflower seeds. Not unpleasant. Not at all unpleasant. But 20 kilos?
After that, things just got a little weird and I basically stopped working. I sat down in the office and wrote about the Holiday tour apportion and then I just ended up there, watching old movies and occasionally refilling the teapot. Again, not unpleasant but nothing particularly to be proud of or to talk about.
On the other hand, days like today are pretty much what I’m looking forward to if I don’t find a way into some serious hobby. I’ve talked about doing some art writing. Maybe putting together plays or screenplays or something like this. I guess I could do whatever I wanted. Short stories, longer stories, poetry, children’s books. I don’t feel that thing I used to feel back when this was something I did regularly. I just don’t know.
I found a few rather depressing links but I will put them up tomorrow. I don’t really feel like destroying today’s writing. Writing about the Torah portion was actually a bit special for me. I took it seriously and it was really something to get ready for. I don’t really think I need to say any more redundant things today about the Russian empire or the war crimes committed. We all know that these things exist and how unfortunate it is.
So let’s shoot for tomorrow. The cleanup is still needed and the bicycle is still waiting for a ride. There won’t be any other pressing business. Don’t mind me if I sound empty. I’m not bored or complaining. I’m just saying that I’m getting used to the peacefulness.
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